Why your "ideal" version is actually holding you back

Do you ever feel like you’re running a race where the finish line keeps moving? I have. The following is what I learned from reading The Gap and the Gain- Dr. Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan. It changed my mindset and hopefully can do the same for you.

In high-performance environments, we are taught to look forward. We set massive goals, visualize the "ideal" version of our careers, and push until we get there. But there’s a psychological trap here: When we measure ourselves against an unreachable ideal, we are living in "The Gap."

In the Gap, all we see is what is missing. We feel frustrated, even when we are technically succeeding, because we haven't reached that moving goalpost yet. Did you know that many CEOs and entrepreneurs have depression even when they are succeeding? It’s true.

The antidote? Measuring the Gain.

To measure the Gain, you look backward. You compare where you are today to where you were a month, a year, or five years ago.

• The Gap is about frustration and "not enough."

• The Gain is about momentum and "look how far I’ve come."

The shift is subtle but transformative:

1. Increased Resilience: When you see evidence of your own growth, you trust yourself more to handle future challenges.

2. Sustainable High Performance: Happiness is a prerequisite for success, not just a result of it. Celebrating gains keeps your "fuel tank" full.

3. Better Leadership: When you stop measuring your team against an impossible ideal and start acknowledging their tangible progress, culture transforms.

So, next time you feel "behind," stop looking at the horizon. Look at your feet. Look at the miles you’ve already covered. You’ve achieved things today that the "you" from three years ago only dreamed of.

Reference: The Gap and the Gain- Dr. Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan